Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Dating a married man

First, a disclaimer: considering the sensitivity of the topic, you are hereby warned that what you're about to read might not be pleasant to your beliefs. Some of the things that will be discussed in this article may be painful. Some may be considered as improper. Some may even be dismissed as condemnable. But the truth is, affairs with married men are a reality. And this article is being written for the party who is often left neglected in similar discussion about this subject: the other woman.

Now, if you find yourself under such a situation, then you know what's happening. Your friends have told you what to expect. Your family, or at least the members who know of your predicament, have told you to desist from the same. You may have resorted to some professional help and they were all in unison in saying that you shouldn't. But you didn't listen to them. You believe that the heart perceives the truth, and your heart is telling you to fight for your love.

So what is the best advice for a woman in an affair with a married man?


Don't


In the event, however, when such a universal advice is not heeded, how are you supposed to deal with such a relationship? Surely, dating a partner who is already to his wife and family isn't an easy experience to endure. Hence, here are some things which you should realize, consider, and observe.

There are many people involved, more than just the two of you. You would have to deal with the guilt of inflicting emotional pain on his spouse and kids. Though you could convince yourself that what they don't know wouldn't hurt them, the fact is that what you're doing would most certainly ruin them. When you're playing with hearts, you're playing with lives, and such is a very sensitive matter. Many lives are destroyed because of the pains of the heart.

Dating a married man entails a lot of restrictions. You cannot be seen in public places together. He could only call when he could find the time away from his family and friends. You cannot visit him at the workplace. These can be too much to bear for anyone.

Dating a married man entails a lot of sacrifices. Though you should be hailed for the capacity of your heart to extend such amount of love, you will receive no praises. You cannot have him all for yourself, you know that much. And though it takes an extraordinary kind of love to pursue such a course, you will still encounter a lot of pains along the way.

Dating a married man could possibly stigmatize you with a lot of condemnable titles. Hence, another reason why you should keep the affair a secret. This could be too much to take for most people. You will have to muster enough internal fortitude to deal with this kind of life.

Dating a married man has a high possibility of being pointless if he's not even contemplating on leaving his spouse. And even if he is indeed thinking about filing a divorce, you would still have to live with the guilt of being a party to a process that ruined a family.

You are not being judged in this article. The situation is already there, and we have to deal with it. With this article, we merely collated and presented some truths which you should know, or truths which you already know though you'd rather not think about them.

But as they say, regret is the act of realizing things belatedly. Conjure enough strength to face the true issues, and perhaps, you won’t have to regret the acts you are doing today.

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